Welcome, 2013!!

Blogging Friends.... This post was initially planned to be "published" yesterday. Nonetheless. As my fingers freely typed away sometime around 11PM, New Year's Eve fireworks exploded outside!! Rose, of course began to panic, tremors pulsing through her poor body. I stopped typing, and lead my girl toward our bedroom. I hooked her red leash. She was basically now--against her own will--incarcerated. For I know very well that if Rose is allowed free roaming of our house during such occasions, then I'd awaken to accidents, or scratched-up doors. I do not want that. So, like with any storm, we "rode it out" together. Eventually, I moved us into the great room. I turned on our television, looking for some New Year's Eve program. I found the news, instead. Yuck. So, I flipped to some channel that was playing "The Twilight Zone", and only halfheartedly watched it. Fireworks periodically boomed all around us. Rose was panicking. Soon, that old black and white TV show was over. "Mission Impossible"--not with Tom Cruise!!--replaced "The Twilight Zone". I wasn't interested. Then, finally, I found this repeated New Year's Eve program. Taylor Swift was onstage performing!! I like that pop/country singer!! I watched this multi-colored illuminated ball drop on television, caught sight of several exploding bottle rockets out our great room window, consoled Rose, and marveled at a Brand New Year!! Then, everything grew silent, as though 2013 never even happened. However, that New Year's Eve program just kept going, and going, and going, like the Energizer Bunny. They promised me country hunk Jason Aldean. I enjoy his songs, as well!! So, I waited, as Rose still trembled beneath my fast-numbing left hand. It was, probably, 1AM when I finally fell asleep. Thus, "today's" Blog post is written as though I did it on December 31st. Because. For the most part, I did!!

This Blog post required twain days to finish!! Twain freakin' days!! I feel as though I've just climbed Mt. Everest, or something!! So. Sorry for the delay in "publishing" it!! Then again. Sorry that it is so lengthy!!   

December 31st. Another New Year lurks ahead of us, filled with bright tomorrows, plus unforeseen events in the distant future. Some positive experiences. Others negative. Another New Year lurks ahead of us carrying with it endless possibilities, personal growth, and further lessons to learn. 2012. A year which will, during swiftly fleeting hours, enter this time capsule of memories never again relived. I like December 31st. It is a time for looking back. An opportunity to reflect upon past seconds, minutes, hours, days, weeks plus months. While many people get sad this time of year, I never have. Because. Right now, I find it a terrible privilege as we move forward into our New Year. Yes, a terrible privilege. And what an interesting year 2012 was for me!! Correct? I was typing for Beautifully Unique, but only had one official Blogging Friend who left faithful comments--Stacey--at the time. I know Ruby in person. She is a very dear friend of ours!! I know Karen, as well. My only Followers were--except Stacey!!--people who I knew. I am not involved with the lives many dog-owning friends. I never have been. In fact, I can count them on one hand. With that, I have felt alone, very alone. Plus, I possess this gift of writing. I wanted to share my talents with the world. So, I longed for--cried over, prayed for--an online Blogging community. Then, in 2012, the world--literally speaking!!--came to me!! I now have Blogging Friends from as far as South Africa!! Plus 35 Followers. Yes!! A community at last!! Called Blogville. I am continually rendered speeches by this!! For words alone cannot express my gratitude!! These wonderful Blogging Friends have instantly loved and accepted me as this weird, crazy, learning disabled, pain-in-the-butt individual!! I need that. Rewind. Before gaining such an amazing community, on March 7th, Rose and I were featured on http://coffeecanine.blogspot.com/ !! All thanks to Charlene, a newly discovered Friend at the time!! We can be found under breed labels on its sidebar: Beagles and German Shepherds!! Rewind again. I became an Auntie in February. My adorable cherubic-faced niece is growing way too fast!! Also in February, I reached the self-realization that I enjoy baking Rose dog biscuits!! Surprisingly, because I am not at all domestic!! I even baked Rose one batch of treats nearly every month throughout 2012!! In March, I filled my small-sized, brown-colored ottoman with memories of both Shadow and Rose. Such as toys, leashes, plus miscellaneous items. Memories to cherish forever!! In April, on our morning walks, Rose and I met this small-sized yellow school bus driver. He routinely pulled over, opened his doors, smiled, and offered my mutt a few Beggin' Littles. Eventually, this friendly bus driver gave me an entire package!! Wow!! Rose, my "food-lovin'" little girl, of course, immediately loved him, and anticipated his generosity!! Also in April, we befriended this Jr. High-age girl named Shelby. Sweet kid. She loves animals--especially Rose!!--and aspires to someday be a veterinarian. You go girl!! Also in April, Rose was introduced--apparently for the first time--to wispy-seeded dandelions. My Curious George seemed so fascinated by them!! When I blew on one, her ears perked, and forehead furrowed. In May, our little world encountered an exotic-looking Chucker Partridge. This bird had black stripes like a Zebra's painted on "his" sides. Plus an ebony marking which wrapped flawlessly around the fowl's chest and eyes that made him look like a bandit, or something. Bright orange feet and beak completed this unique bird's appearance. His "call" was equally peculiar. And noisy!! Best as I can describe it, when this bird opens his beak, he lets out something that sounds like a dying car engine!! Not so pretty!! I thought this fowl was the loveliest creature that I'd ever set my eyes on. Rose? My "birddog" licked her lips upon seeing that Chucker!! She considered him food!! On May 4th, we saw "The Avengers" in our local movie theater. Best. Group. Superhero. Film. Ever!! And, as a learning disabled person that has lived far too long like Bruce Banner, somebody who does not want her limitations, I--shockingly!!--found inspiration from Tony Stark!! All because of one scene. When Tony Stark is having a deep, serious conversation with Bruce Banner. This scene:  

Tony Stark: You know, I've got a cluster of shrapnel, trying every second to crawl its way into my heart.
[Stark points at the mini-arc reactor in his chest]
Tony Stark: This stops it. This little circle of light. It's part of me now, not just armor. It's a... terrible privilege.
Bruce Banner: But you can control it.
Tony Stark: Because I learned how.
Bruce Banner: It's different.
[Banner tries to read the computer screen, but Stark slides the data aside with his finger so the two can see face-to-face]
Tony Stark: Hey, I've read all about your accident. That much gamma exposure should have killed you.
Bruce Banner: So you're saying that the Hulk... the other guy... saved my life? That's nice. It's a nice sentiment. Save it for... what?
Tony Stark: I guess we'll find out.
[Banner and Stark get back to work at their respective computers]
Bruce Banner: You might not enjoy that.
Tony Stark: You just might.

After that, I have slowly realized that as far as my learning disabilities--plus birth defects which started it all--are concerned, It's a... terrible privilege. This is an incredibly humbling concept. Also in May, I happily learned that I am "Google famous"!! That's right. I occasionally Google myself!! Well, that's very humble of me!! And today, if you type in Beautifully Unique, my Blog is there!! Right now, it's number two!! Number two!! As someone who oddly craves being well-known, I will take it!! By the way? This just discovered. I am also "Bing famous"!! Yep!! If you Bing-search Beautifully Unique, I am number one!! Pretty fun.... In 2012, my Blog earned six awards--which mean the world to me--including twain back-to-back Very Inspiring Blogger Awards!! Thank-you, Friends!! Also in May, Rose met some neighbors' Pit Bull/Labrador Retriever cross puppy through our cyclone gate. She was thrilled upon meeting a new friend. Me? I was a bit nervous, but tried my best to hide it!! Rose is my baby, and I am an overprotective Mama!! Guilty as charged!! Meanwhile, she taught me about never allowing media coverage to control my opinions regarding Pit Bulls. And their mixes. After all, Rose cannot allow the media to influence her "perspective". She doesn't even see Skip as a Pit Bull cross!! Rose cannot watch, or hear news coverage about these so-considered "man-attacking" beasts. She sees Skip as a dog, another mutt, no different from herself!! How wrong was I to think otherwise. How wrong was I.... Also in May, I learned on a hike that--much like Indiana Jones--Rose is terrified of snakes!! One slithered up from beneath this boardwalk's crack, and Rose took three steps backward!! Interesting. I love snakes!! Also in May, We experienced an unexpected thunderstorm. While away!! So Rose--who was "abandoned"--ran through our house, left saliva markings everywhere, and scratched up my bedroom door!! Poor baby.... I was not there for her!! In June, my family and I drove to our beautiful local beach. We stayed all day. For the first time, I entrusted Rose to somebody else. Not some boarding kennel. Rose loves her freedom too much. Not a house-sitter. No. She stayed the day at my Grandparents' house!! Honestly? Even that was nerve-wracking. But my Grandparents are responsible, trustworthy people!! In July, on the Fourth, my sister watched some downy-feathered baby chicks. Rose, of course, saw those high-pitched peeping birds as food!! So we kept them locked away--in a bedroom--thus everybody was safe!! Also on the Fourth, for dinner, we ate home-made fried chicken!! I love how ironic life can be!! Fireworks? They began around 6PM. Before dusk!! I spent six hours sitting on our hard "boy's bathroom" floor, stroking Rose's velvet-soft fur, singing patriotic songs, and waiting that insanity out. Panicked tremors never, for one second, worked their way through her body. Amazingly. Also in July, we ran into this family. They brought along their tiny miniature Dachshund puppy. Quite the yappy little thing, as most small dogs are!! I learned then, as my ears listened and mind observed, that yapping "out-barks" baying!! Who would have known? It was in June when I confessed of Rose's long-standing addiction to chocolate. Oh, she is terrible!! I have lost count how many times I've been forced to "save" Rose by pulling chocolate out of her mouth!! She needs help. Is there such a thing as rehab facilities for canines with chocolate problems? Hmmm. Choco-holic Anonymous? Also in July, we experienced extremely-loud-and-incredibly-close wall-rattling thunder and lightning around 5AM!! Rose awoke me for that with a THUD against my bed frame. I love this type of weather. However. I had never felt so unsafe, or so vulnerable during a thunder and lightning storm!! It was eerie!! For thunder rolled above us as though some high-speed train were driving past our house!! I temporarily lost my sanity during the Summer of 2012. I learned about Robert Downey Jr.'s--his word--"notorious" past. The good, the bad and the ugly, as that phrase goes. And I grew up. Suddenly a part of my innocence felt as though it was stripped away. I matured. For Robert Downey Jr. has broadened my horizons in more ways than one. And I have changed some negative behaviors. Because it turns out, that Robert Downey Jr. and I are quite a lot alike!! Personality. Idiosyncrasies. And.... "Character defects". I am stubborn. As was he. Being stubborn is my birthright, so no complete transformations there!! I refuse to listen. Neither did he. I am still working on that one!! I made lame excuses, used my premature short-term memory loss as a motive, and lied. So did he, minus the learning disability, of course. I repeatedly broke promises. Said that I would do this, or partake in that. But I did not care. Just. Like. Him. So, because of Robert Downey Jr., I learned. I spent so much of 2012 gleaning self-revelations. And, while reading about Robert Downey Jr.'s self-destructive past, I gained a sense of empathy and compassion which never before existed toward addicts. In August, while we shampooed carpets, Rose became my "prisoner". As I typed, her comically-sized pillow was placed on the "boy's bathroom" floor. With dog toys strewn about. It was the perfect temporary location for my mutt. She could see and hear me type. Her water was nearby. And, she takes up little room!! So. I had a bit of fun with this!! I pretended that Rose was incarcerated. She had few freedoms. Eating? Allowed. Drinking? Allowed. Urination and/or bowel movements? Allowed. Walks? Allowed. Exiting her "prison cell"? Not allowed!! Sitting on a nearly-broken white Lifetime chair, and placing my right hand pointer finger to our black computer keyboard, I was Rose's "prison guard"!! I took this job very seriously. Rose was, for the most part, a cooperative furry little inmate, switching positions on its tile floor, and seldom ever leaving her "prison cell". My submissive girl.... Rose was released on bail at the end of that day for an enormous financial cost. How large a sum? I am not at liberty to say.... Also in August, Rose went missing. Where was she? My bed? No. The great room? No. Mom and Dad's bedroom? No. Outside? Not likely. Then, somebody considered Uncle Michael's bedroom. The door was closed. That somebody turned its knob. Standing there on the other side, waiting--patiently--yet looking rather co nfused, was Rose!! Poor girl? Well.... Consider the believable facts in how Rose got locked behind that wooden hollow bedroom door. It was not because somebody accidently closed it on her. Uh-uh. Rose's black nostrils detected something, something tempting, something of bread "crusts" and butter. She is my "food lovin'" Beagle cross, after all!! And nobody was watching that hound!! Rose wandered freely toward Uncle Michael's bedroom, where, placed upon his couch, lie her "treasure"!! Why not go after it? Then, an open window sucked shut the door!! Also in August, our Grandmother came to visit--for two weeks--from California. My ever-sociable girl loved this new friend!! However. One Saturday, two days after Grandma's arrival, everybody piled into our Chevy minivan, and drove to a museum-like location. Everybody, except for Rose. She disliked that!! For Rose must have found it was strange that, immediately after Grandma settled in, we would be leaving!! Sans the dog. Oh, she was very upset with me!! Rose ran from room to room, bouncing off our walls like Winnie the Pooh's Tigger!! No kidding!! Following our exit, Rose balanced her front legs upon the living room window, and those mighty vocal chords let out this pathetic series of high-pitched baying!! My heart shattered like some broken glass as I listened helplessly to Rose's lonesome crying before we drove away. I hate leaving her under these circumstances!! Hate it. Then, the next afternoon, on Sunday, Rose became clingy to me. As though I were a refrigerator, and she was some strong magnet!! Everywhere I walked, Rose followed. Plus, she was obviously fidgety. Strange. It's not like I was ignoring Rose because of Grandma. Nope!! I could never be that type of Mama!! I know my little girl's needs, wants, and behaviors. I understand Rose. She needs my loving. Needs it. So, I have stroked Rose's velvet-soft fur whenever possible. I've continued with her walks. However. Should you ask Rose what is going on around here, she would most likely whine: Nobody's paying enough attention to me!! Doesn't anyone understand that I'm the most important creature who ever walked this planet? Anyone? Will you pet me? Will you? Will you? Will you? This is animal neglect!! I do not know where she gets her "Drama Queen" traits from.... In 2012, I made even further self-revelations. More growing. More maturity. More change. I am a "one step forward, two steps back" personality-type. Aren't we all? In September, we--Rose included!!--drove to a beautiful rustic, spacious log cabin!! It was plain and simple!! The moment we arrived at the cabin, my hound mix's ebony nostrils immediately inspected every corner, every floorboard, every staircase, every room. Repeatedly!! We hiked down these wooden stairs on a porch, explored the creek, and walked circles around our cabin. Repeatedly!! By the end of our first day, my canine wore me out!! During our first evening, we started the fire pit. Everybody cooked hotdogs and brats!! Yummy!! Rose, safe from any flying sparks, was temporarily tethered to the porch's post. Afterward, some of us roasted colossal-sized marshmallows for s'mores!! Mmmm!! My fingers were sticky after eating the sweet treat. So I headed up our porch to wash them in the kitchen sink. As soon as I was finished, my ears heard this familiar high-pitched baying sound. Rose!! So I flew through our cabin as fast as my legs could carry me. They sped up once I reached the porch stairs. Down, down, down I ran. I then observed Rose's surroundings. Everybody had gone their separate ways, thus abandoning Rose!! Poor baby!! She hates being left behind!! Certainly my presumably neglected mutt's thoughts went something like this: Hey!! Where'd everybody go? Oh, they left me!! They left me!! Make a lot of noise. Maybe they'll come for me!! Oh.... They're not coming back. They're not coming back!! I've been left behind!! Rose was instantaneously silent the second I returned to her side, however!! But she did not bay for very long!! I can only imagine her thoughts upon seeing me: Mama!! You came back for me!! I'm saved!! Of course I came back.... In October, we drove Rose to see her veterinarian. She was due for vaccinations. Inside the veterinarian's waiting room, I found this chair which was positioned next to a large window. After hearing Rose's name be called, we followed some lady down their narrow hall, weighed her canine patient on a scale, then entered this vacant room. Which, of course, my hound dog's ebony nostrils inspected!! Every corner, every crevice!! When our busy veterinarian simply passed by the doorway, Rose let out this low, resounding growl. I firmly, yet patiently, scolded her. It meant nothing.... Right? Rose sometimes growls at our neighbor boys through the living room window before remembering that they are friends!! Silly girl!! But there was a negative vibe at the veterinarian's office that day. A negative vibe. As we were waiting--patiently!!--for our balding silver-haired senior experienced doctor to step through the door, some poor woman was euthanizing her canine. We could overhear their somber conversations. From across the hall. The second our veterinarian walked in, Rose's mighty vocal chords let out this series of loud, ferocious barking!! Followed by aggressive growling. More barking. Further aggressive growling. Weird. Rose's behavior was "out-of-character"!! And mean!! Rose is my little sociable "pacifist"!! She loves everybody, and would not hurt a fly!! Ever!! Nonetheless, if my reflexes were not well-trained, I am afraid that Rose would have bitten our veterinarian!! What a frightening concept. But, I yanked Rose back so fast!! Then I scolded her. Eventually, she settled down. We lifted her up onto this tall, silver examination table. He injected his syringe into Rose's thigh. By then at least she was calm and relaxed!! The doctor asked a few questions. We answered. And, within seconds, his task was complete!! Just like that. So, Rose's temporary "mean streak" was for naught!! Or. Was it? She had "opinions". This balding silver-haired senior experienced doctor with the syringe is not her friend!! A canine died here, for Heaven's sake. She does not like this man!! This murderer!! So Rose "told him off"!! She was only expressing freedom of speech, after all!! Is that such a bad thing? Also in October, I learned that Rose dislikes pecans!! I was chopping up eight cups of the nut for some dessert that we were baking, a Taylor Swift CD blaring loudly in our stereo. Eight cups?! It was for some church event, so we needed enough. Rose, ever the beggar, wanted those pecans!! Please, Mama? Can I have some? Can I? Can I? Can I? Can I? Can I? Pleeeease? Oh, those colossal deep brown eyes!! Who can resist them? So, I set one aside, just for my little girl. However, Rose had to wait. Patiently!! Otherwise she will return and beg for more!! Plus, I had a huge task to complete!! So. As soon as I had nearly eight cups of the chopped nut--we ran out!!--I kept my promise to Rose. Her one pecan awaited!! Rose, who had moved on to chase squirrels in lovely Autumn sunshine, was visibly eager. I do get one? Really?! I had just about given up hope!! I tossed the raw pecan into Rose's expectant mouth. She spit it out. Immediately. Only to pounce on the nut, and throw it around our great room like some hunting feline with a mouse!! Repeatedly!! This carried on for seemingly the longest time!! I laughed, and laughed, and laughed!! So hard, in fact, that my abdomen muscles ached afterward!! Which, of course, was a good sensation!! You gotta love belly laughs!! In 2012, I revealed on Beautifully Unique that I was born with a birth defect called craniosynostosis. Wait. What?! Craniosynostosis. I was born sans any soft spot. Twain separate scull operations--one of which he removed bone from my forehead--is probably responsible for any and all "developmental delays". Not that I am blaming our skilled neurosurgeon!! He did preserve my life, based on research. Craniosynostosis, according to medical facts 28 years ago, mostly affected boys. Based on some Web site that I recently found, this still stands accurate. And I am, most assuredly, female!! According to an Internet research study, one out of every 2,000 live births are afflicted with craniosynostosis. I highly doubt that this statistic has changed throughout the course of 28 years!! Statistics are seldom ever altered!! The cause of craniosynostosis remains unknown. It is, for the most part, sporadic, happening by chance, according to one recently updated Web site. So I was "chosen". Thus. I suffer from premature short-term memory loss.... And have my entire life. In October, I witnessed a beautiful, rare occurrence. An Autumn rainbow!! It was a half-arch stretched across the skies. There is something so magical about rainbows!! They are momentary vapors, like ourselves. Blink, and you will miss their brilliant colors pained across the sky!! But. To witness an Autumn rainbow, as crisp winds blow loose leaves through the air, that is magical!! So magical. I then stood there, stock-still, completely hypnotized by this half-rainbow. This fleeting moment. I saw the rainbow become brighter, as sunshine illuminated it like some stage's spotlight. Ooooh!! And I watched the rainbow disappear in the grey clouds!! Vanished!! Just like that!! I then began humming the tune to "Somewhere Over A Rainbow". Automatically!! I wonder why.... In November, I admitted to successfully teaching Rose the term "crack on" from "Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows". Because. For reasons beyond my comprehension, I love, love, love Robert Downey Jr.'s line: "Now. Do you need me to elaborate. Or can we just crack on?". So. I taught "crack on" to Rose!! Accidentally!! To Rose, "crack on" is translated: "Time for a walk!!". Then. You, my dear Blogging Friends from across the pond, educated me on the fact that "crack on" is frequently used over there!! Neat!! You learn something new every day!! Also in November, during an evening walk, I saw Venus shining brightly. We were facing onward, when, I witnessed it. The moon!! But, as its beams rose upward, they reflected on Venus!! I stood there, stock-still, and stared, utterly mesmerized by this unexpected gift of nature. Rose and I were just about to turn back toward home, when the moon peeked through those grey clouds, slowly arising. It was breathtaking!! In December, I learned that Rose does not have an appetite for poinsettias. Because we had one, as it sat displayed on our great room floor. Near the illuminated Christmas tree. In fact, Rose has never--never--noshed on plants!! She prefers food products!! I do not even think that I've ever seen my little girl nibble on fresh green grass!! When we leave home, I place the cheery plant upon our great room table, far from Rose's reach. Temporarily. Unless I forget. Which, I admit, has happened. Twice. Such was the case one Sunday morning. While sitting in the our church's chapel, singing Christmas carols, what site did my eyes witness? A cluster of cheery bright red poinsettias!! Oh!! I forgot!! was my dreaded mental response. But what does a concerned Mama do in such situations? We were thirty minutes away from home!! Literally!! If Rose were going to commit suicide by ingesting that plant, she would have already done so. Correct? Oh, it was such a helpless situation!! So what did I do? I panicked. Then I said a silent prayer asking God to protect Rose from that poinsettia. And suddenly, I felt this sense of peace that everything was fine at home. Everything was fine. Just fine. Homemade chocolate candy, plentiful that time of year, was either contained or put away, out of Rose's reach. Because, after all. Rose has a problem. She is my chocolate addict!! But the poinsettia was not out of Rose's reach!! We returned home, and I immediately inspected that plant. It was untouched!! God answered my prayer.... 2012, also, saw some beloved Blogging Friends pass away. Sadly. So 2012 was a successful year for me. Beautifully Unique became internationally known. Stories have--for the most part!!--been plentiful. But emotionally? 2012 was a roller coaster ride. As I struggled with self-acceptance, mood swings, and pity parties!! Three cheers for 2013. It is going to be a better year!!