Freakishly Accurate

Blogging Friends.... Sigh!! I have been dealing with some "Blogger's Block" lately!! So much time, such little inspiration!! Hopefully, my posts have not been lacking....

After note: This was written yesterday evening/last night.   

Accusations. I have been dealt many from time to time throughout my life. Some are falsehoods. During which I defend myself. Adamantly!! Which, only makes me look guilty!! Why is that? Others are true. And no denial in the world could prove them wrong!! This Summer, my nine-year old cousin has given me one of those true-cannot-argue-against accusations. "You have a crush on Iron Man!!" And, he always says it teasingly, singing that sentence, as though Tony Stark and I are Jr. High lovebirds!! Nine-year old immaturity!! Ya gotta love it!! I certainly do!! When my ears first heard this accusation, I giggled. Somewhat sarcastically. "Is it that obvious?" I asked him. Still singing, he said: "Yes!! You have a crush on Iron Man!!" Wow. My "secret" is out. I have a crush on Iron Man!! I suppose this means that I am an easy read. Because, really?! All I have done is devoted most of my Summer to impersonating Iron Man!! Happily. Which, I admit is weird, considering the very fact that I'm a girl!! I never should have been even allowed to impersonate Iron Man!! Never!! My cousin wanted to be Iron Man!! And, I never would have accepted this "role". If it were not for my acting like some spoiled-rotten child whose Mommy said "no" to candy at the grocery store. If it were not for my slow, low tone of voice, quivered bottom lip, and slumping shoulders. If it were not for my one pathetic whine: "But I wanna be Iron Man...." True story!! I conned the kid!! And, he let me be Iron Man!! But, in my own defense, I was joking!! Which makes it okay.... Right? Hmmm. Nonetheless, I impersonated Iron Man that day--all day--guilt free!! Yep. I was like that spoiled-rotten child with the candy. Mommy caved.... And I got my way!! The following day, I took a dose of maturity. I need that sometimes!! I offered Iron Man to my cousin. But then he told me something that I will remember forever. Forever. He said: "You're the best Iron Man!!" Aw, sweet!! But I replied: "Oh, I am not the best Iron Man. I'm not Robert Downey Jr.  He's the best Iron Man. I'm just impersonating him." And I was. I have impersonated Robert Downey Jr.'s Iron Man on a ridiculously obsessive level. Even for me!! I lowered my voice, which was not at all that difficult to achieve!! I made both mental--and physical!!--notes of the character requirements regarding being Iron Man. I watched both movies. I studied pictures. And.... I observed Iron Man. Every week, I excitedly anticipated my impersonation of the superhero. Excitedly anticipated it. I conceived ways that I could improve Iron Man. I was always working on him. My version of Iron Man is close, but a far from perfect copy of Robert Downey Jr.'s. And that's okay!! Because I am no Robert Downey Jr.!! Nor do I wish to be!! Nope!! I want to be me!! Whoever that is!! Yet, somehow, in an unusual and palpable way, Iron Man now feels a part of me. I must be unable to comprehend this. Because I cannot explain it!! Tomorrow may be my last opportunity to ever again impersonate Iron Man. I am feeling both emotional, and grateful at the same time. I'm also nostalgic. I own an Iron Man action figure--a children's toy, really--that stands, right hand repulsor blast out, on my bedroom shelf. He will eternally commemorate this Summer. It was a good run.... Alright. So I have a crush on Iron Man!! Big deal!! According to psychologist Elizabeth Lombardo: The piece of shrapnel lodged near Iron Man's heart doesn't stop him from using his powers to protect and defend others. "He has taken a bad experience and turned it into something positive," she says. A woman drawn to him appreciates the antihero, the underdog who relies first and foremost on his wits. Oh. My. Goodness!! "A woman drawn to him appreciates the antihero"? Plus "the underdog"? Whoa. That is a freakishly accurate description of me!! A freakishly accurate description of me!! Especially her part about the underdog!! I am a colossal believer in second chances. Heaven knows that I have been given plenty throughout my life!! The underdog not only needs second chances, but, eventually, he earns them!! Kind of like Tony Stark.... Rose is my "second chance" girl.... In more ways than one!! She was adopted at age three, rescued from our local shelter. Before Rose, I owned Shadow. My German Shepherd/Golden Retriever cross. Although I never stopped loving Shadow, my feelings toward her altered over time. I began to slowly take Shadow for granted. I let petty behavior annoy me. I was impatient with her. I deeply regret all of this. Rose is my second chance, that Sleeping Beauty who is, as these words are being typed, curled up on her comically-sized dog pillow. And I am grateful, so very grateful. May I never take this amazing second chance for granted....